The obvious question is what the hell is swag? Urban Dictionary defines swag or swagger as: appearance, style, or the way he or she presents themselves. From pop icons to public figures, swag is what will allow one to have a magnetic effect on the people around them. Regardless of how the word was coined, it denotes a meaningful concept. Swag is simply having more than enough confidence in yourself, but not too much that it becomes arrogance.
Swag in Your Business
Have you ever met a person who you thought was really, for a lack of a better word, cool? A person so cool that in your mind you could not help but to say, “wow!” Now imagine that person making business deals, negotiating with clients, speaking in front of large groups. Do you think they can have a more profound effect on the people they speak to then you? Yes! The obvious question: why? People want to do business with people who feel confident about themselves.
If you do not believe in yourself, why should other people, right?
Has there ever been a time when you were not feeling at the top of your game and you instantly noticed the wrong people being attracted to you? By ‘attracted to you’ I do not mean in a sexual connotation, I mean as far as business, friendship, or just as a human being. Trust me, it happens to everyone several times throughout their life.
It is very similar to having charisma and that magnetic attraction, people are automatically drawn to be around you.
The more the people that want to be around you the less resistance you will get from potential prospects. Having swag in others helps you close deals with less effort and energy on your part.
Swag in Your Relationships (small excerpt)
Women dig guys who have swag. Regardless of money, if you can carry yourself with swag, then you can have almost any women out there. Take a guy like Tom Leykis who is clearly not a good looking guy, but he does have swag. Even if he was dead broke, he can still get almost any women he wants.
Swag is not only for men, women with swag also prosper. Women who have swag tend to attract much better quality guys. Too many women unfortunately end up with losers am I right ladies? Some of you women could care less, but I can easily bet a majority of women want the good quality guys. Carry yourself well with confidence (swag) and you will start to notice that your subconsciously weeding through most of the jerks.
How do you get “Swag”?
The simple solution is: be an actor. No I do not mean being an actor like on TV or in the movies, I mean ‘act as if’:
- you are successful
- you always get what you want
- you love yourself
- you feel secure
- you can do anything you set your mind to
- it is never too late
- anything is possible
- people like you
Even if you do not believe in the above said, pretend that you do. It does not matter if your swag is fake because you will sooner or later subconsciously believe it to be true, which is what counts. Fake it till you make it.
A few more techniques to portray swag:
- Posture – Simply standing up tall and straight does a lot to a person’s swag. Who knew that all your mom’s nagging about standing up straight was true. Then continue using a strong posture as you move or walk around.
“Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I’m a woman’s man: no time to talk…”
- Speaking – speak with confidence and believe everything you say to be true. Too many “ums”, “ers,” and any other 2 letter word you use when speak can decrease your swag tremendously. Act as if you are a cop and speak with conviction.
- Dress – invest in yourself by buying clothes that actually fit. “You look good you feel good” goes a long way. Tailors are your new friend!
Swag is really just a new word of being confident, powerful, and charismatic. If you can convince yourself to have swag right now, you will almost instantly see a difference in your personal and business life.
Do you have swag? If you do not, then act as if you do for a few days and tell me the difference of how life begins to revolve around you.
There’s a recent book called Honest Signals that reveals research that a person’s behaviors are a good predictor of whether their ‘pitch’ is successful. Basically, if you behave both as if you’re going to be successful (confidence), and the way the person you talk to acts (rapport or familiarity) then you’ll be successful.
here’s a little video talking about his research
Wow! Great video. Yep I totally agree that communication can be measured and purposely tweaked to directly affect your your ability to create rapport and ultimately success.
Thanks for sharing this.
Good article AJ. It’s amazing how effective the pretending something technique is in programming your non-conscious mind to work its magic.
Thanks Stephen. I love the ‘fake it till you make it’ technique. There is also that whole part about you get what you focus on. So if you focus on that swag regardless of whether you have it or not, you’re more likely to get it.
hmmm.. you know who uses hmm & errrs a lot? That’s right EL PREZIDENTE, Barak Obama, …no one in the corner got swagga like Obama!! =]
-Good Post, Being confident is always important, but don’t cross over to arrogance.
lol. Obama does use a lot of ers and hmms. Regardless of those mistakes, he is an amazing communicator. If he did not use those, he would be even better!
I think the “hmmm’s” & “errrr’s” make him sound more human, more like the common man… what more does a politician need than that.
No, I’ve read a lot of reviews about him as far as his “hmms” and “errs” go. When he does that, it’s clear he’s making stuff up in his mind as he goes along. It’s not on purpose, it’s more on the involuntary side.Don’t get me wrong, Obama’s REALLY good. In fact, he’s supposedly highly trained in NLP and Persuasion.
I think the “hmms” and ‘errs” shows that he is thinking things through before saying it. As opposed to his VP Joe Biden.
One thing you can see is that he uses it confidently, hence its not a sign of weakness, like when Bush uses “err”
Haha, you make a good point there about Bush, lol. However, he would be a much more powerful speaker if he didn’t use it. And yes, by using those types of words, you are basically buying time for the next thing you are about to say.
This article basically states that you can develop charisma even if you don’t yet have it, and that acting is fine to do and can become reality. Both of those are good points.
I would point out that the article does NOT say that you should bend people to your will against their will, or use your influence to get things you should not. It is more about getting what each of deserve if we are truly offering something to others — we should each receive respect and positive response from others.
Everything that I teach can be used in a harmful way, but I almost always make it perfectly clear that it should be used ethically. So I agree, you should not bend people to your will or against their will.
Persuasion to me is like anything else that has both good and evil connected to it. It is the mind of the beholder that determines which direction they go.
I completely agree with you. These three – posture, speaking and clothes – all of these really make up your swag. Even though you are fat, you are thin, you are not good-looking. With these three at your best – people would be attracted to you.
Its not about the looks, its all about the attitude.
Great one here, AJ.
how do you tell if swag is fake?
I prefer to know what I'm dealing with. What's the point of getting involved with a man or a woman who has a fake swagger? I may have to end up paying for their fakeness?
I know lots of people who have plenty of swag but they just never seem to quite make it no matter how much they fake it.
As far as dealing with people who have fake swag…I wouldn't know because frankly it doesn't matter to me to find out. If someone shows that they have swag and they can back it up…great. If they can't, move onto the next person. Showing fake-swag is just opening up new opportunities one would not have if they show no swag.
Hi really enjoyed reading your post.
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Really great post, enjoyed reading it. Thanks
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its not about dark and bright white its about ethics some matter he is deficient of.
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