Who’s On Your Team?

They say that a man is only as good as the people he surrounds himself with.  So with the New Year approaching, it’s time to take a look at all of the people on your team in order to determine whether or not the relationships you’ve built up to this point are strong enough to help you achieve your personal and professional goals.

Specifically, consider all of the following different relationship types, as well as how effectively they’re serving your personal mission:

Your family

While we can’t always choose the members of our family, we can make an effort to ensure that these relationships aren’t actively working against our chances of achieving success within our lives.

If your familial relationships tend to be positive, ask yourself whether or not you’re investing enough time into these bonds in order to keep them strong.  Often, it’s easy to let these connections fall to the wayside when we get busy – but doing so risks family ties weakening when we need them the most.  To prevent this from occurring, make an effort to connect with the family members you care about on a regular basis.

On the other hand, if your family members have been less-than-supportive throughout the years, there’s nothing wrong with protecting yourself by cutting ties with toxic relatives.  If the relationships you have with your family members bring nothing positive to your life, remove yourself from them in order to prevent this stress and anger from interfering with your chances of accomplishing your life goals.

Your personal acquaintances

It’s often said that friends are the family members we can actually choose – so take a few minutes to determine whether or not you’ve chosen wisely!

Friends can play a number of different roles within our lives.  They can be people who build us up and provide the encouragement needed to grow personally and professionally.  Or, they can be relationships that have long outlived their usefulness, comprised of people who don’t have your best interests at heart.

If you’ve got great friends, make it a priority not to lose these people by committing time to keeping in contact with them.  And if you don’t, consider a New Year’s Resolution to end relationships that aren’t serving your needs and to find better friends who can support you in the way you deserve.

Your professional network

As 2013 starts to roll around, take a close look at the people you interact with in a professional capacity – including your direct reports, colleagues, managers and mentors.  Can you see yourself achieving your business goals with the support of these people, or do you feel stymied by a professional network that doesn’t match up with your expectations?

If, upon closer inspection, you find that your current professional position won’t likely allow for the type of growth you’d like to experience in 2013, do your best to change your circumstances!  Seek out new mentors, look into transferring to a new department or leave your job entirely if the situation can’t be resolved – just don’t let the people surrounding you currently prevent you from achieving your professional goals.

Your advisors

Depending on your personal situation, your team of advisors may include attorneys, estate planners, accountants, financial managers, insurance agents or other professionals who provide invaluable advice to manage areas of your life where you lack specific knowledge.

As a general rule, it’s better to have these relationships in place before you need them – rather than rushing around to find qualified advisors in the wake of an emergency situation.  So even if you don’t have an immediate need for any of the different types of professionals at this point in your life, it won’t hurt to start researching contacts and soliciting recommendations from others in your life so that you’ll have access to this information when you do need it.

On the other hand, if you have existing relationships with these professionals, it’s also important to check in regularly to determine whether or not their performance is up to par.  If, for example, your financial manager hasn’t delivered the rates of return he promised, use the New Year to start shopping around for new financial support for your personal team.

Your health support system

Finally, pay close attention to the people who help manage your health, as your overall well-being is one of your most important assets.  Specifically, examine the relationships you hold with your:

  • Doctor or holistic medical practitioner
  • Dentist
  • Eye doctor
  • Personal trainer
  • Massage therapist/chiropractor/acupuncturist
  • Therapist

All of these different professionals play a major role in the overall quality of your life, so it’s important that the relationships you have with them be as strong as possible.  After all, you’re a heck of a lot more likely to seek out the health care you need if you like the people you work with!

If you don’t like one of your support system members, but have been continually booking appointments out of habit – stop!  Ask around or search for reviews online in order to find the health support team members who will keep you healthy and happy as we head into 2013!

2 thoughts on “Who’s On Your Team?

  1. Rose

    I would like to say I love your articles AJ, they are inspiring & uplifting!
    I have done much personal and professional growth in the last couple years and I have had the need to let go of many toxic friendships. While this does clear the air for me & makes my outlook & perspective clearer, I have basically come to a point in my life where I am alone. There is no way I want to go back to loser friends but at the same time I had to let go of a whole GROUP of friends.
    Even though I am socially outgoing, making new friends has got to be one of the most difficult things to do especially if the opportunities are just not there. And yes I have been trying desperately (classes, sports, etc…)
    Any suggestions?

  2. Abbey

    I think a certain part of it is that some of us may feel like there is no reaosn to take it slow. Up until recently we didnt have the right to get married anywhere. Even though a few states have legalized it, many others have officially banned it. Many states have laws against gay adoption. Some of us just feel like if there is no chance for us to be together and function as a couple, why should we live by heterosexual standards of moving slow, waiting until marriage (That we cant even have) to have sex, waiting until marriage to move in, or even monogamy. Those are all heterosexual practices, and heterosexuals always want to make it clear that we arent the same and dont have a right to be the same. So from my view point, why try? I support and fight for equality laws in marriage and adoption and hate crimes and everything else. But why on earth should I wait for marriage to have sex when Im not even allowed to get married to a woman? But, that is the more cynical view. The more empathetic view, I think is that we just tend to be more open about stuff. We have all had to think about and come to terms with things about our sexuality that straight people dont have to. Maybe a part of it is that during this coming to terms, we just end up far more comfortable with sexuality than other people do.Although, I know plenty of heterosexuals that do the same things listed in your post. I dont know that its actually fair to say gay people do it more.


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